Don't Let Go (Hope Harbor Book 3) Read online

  Once they were seated, April took her hand. “Aggie, you know I’d do anything for you but I won’t stay silent any longer. I’ve probably done you more harm than good by letting you hide what happened.” She held up her finger as Aggie tried to protest. “Let me finish. I’m not going to go and tell your family what happened; that’s up to you. But what I am suggesting is you talk to Bradley; use his years of experience to help you. If you can’t stand to discuss it with someone so close to you, arrange a visit to Seattle once a month. I’ll get you a list of good psychologists so you can choose one. You need to deal with this and stop letting it ruin your life. You have to stop hiding and live your life again.” She plastered a smile on her face when the waitress approached their table, forcing Aggie to hold back the retort she wanted to throw at her friend.

  Once their order arrived, the steam had faded from her mood and all she wanted to do was eat and go home, but April wasn’t letting her wallow in her pain. With a hot French fry in her hand like a pointer, she spoke again. “I know you didn’t want to do it at the time, but have you reconsidered talking to the police about it?”

  Aggie shook her head as April dipped the fry into the sauce. “No point. I didn’t see his face or any distinguishing marks. I heard his voice but it wasn’t clear enough to identify him. All it’ll do is make me relive it, and for what? So some detectives can grill me and give me nightmares again?”

  April grabbed another fry and jammed it in her mouth like a starving woman. Must be a pregnancy thing. Aggie felt guilty for making her wait for food. “But what if someone else was attacked and they saw more than you did?”

  “There’s nothing I can give the police to identify the guy that attacked me. Nothing. I’m not going to waste my time on this when I’m already flat out at work. Just forget it, please.”

  “Only if you talk to someone. I mean it. Drew is all over me to find out what’s going on. I can’t tell him, but I won’t be able to lie to my husband forever. For your own sanity, honey, you need to get help.”

  Maybe she did. But what if talking about it revealed the one thing she was most afraid of—that there was no way to cure the ache that filled her heart? No way to go back to the woman she used to be?

  She’d rather not know how damaged she really was.

  Chapter 5

  “What am I supposed to do, Drew? April won’t say what’s going on and if I try to talk to Aggie, she closes up on me.” It made Liam sick to think he’d been mooning over her for so long and nothing had changed. He crossed his legs and stared at his best friend over his desk. Their habit was to catch up after the last patient had left and the staff was gone for the night and discuss the day’s cases. The wedding and Aggie took up more meetings than the practice had these last two weeks since Drew had asked Liam to be his best man.

  “I don’t know. Just try to be her friend. Maybe she’ll open up to you eventually. I’m kind of lost too.” Drew scratched his chin and sighed. “It was something in Seattle; it had to be.”

  “I don’t know what. She never told me.”

  “Did you even keep up with her then, or were you too busy chasing nurses?”

  Liam sighed. As if! “You know better than that, so stop stirring the pot. We were both worked to exhaustion as the lowest of the low interns, in case you forgot.” Those were hard days. “Too busy trying to catch a wink of sleep in between our ridiculous schedules to date anyone.”

  “Do you think it had something to do with her job? A guy? Was she even dating anyone that we know of?”

  Liam shook his head. “No idea, but I definitely think something happened over there.”

  Drew agreed. “Why else would she come back to the island and buy a bakery of all things? She’d never shown any interest in bread or baking before. Apart from being the first to eat the crust off the loaf on weekends when Dad bought it warm for a treat.”

  “I was thinking the same thing.” Liam leaned back in his chair and ran a hand through his hair, tugging at the short strands in frustration. There had to be something he could do to put a smile on her face again. “She’s not the person we used to know. Coming home and buying the business came out of the blue. It’s almost as if she’s avoiding everyone, and I don’t know why.” He shook his head. “Is there anyone else you can ask, besides April, that is?”

  “Doubt it. I don’t think she keeps in contact with anyone from Seattle anymore. At least not that I know of.”

  “Go and see her. Ask her outright. What’ve you got to lose?”

  “Pride.”

  “I doubt that. Everyone knows how you feel about her.” Drew stood. “I have to go. April has things we need to discuss, apparently.” He gave a laugh. “Thank goodness I’m only doing this once. Hey, have you spoken to Deacon about delivering the bride and bridesmaid to the church yet? Pretty sure we put that on your list of things to do. You don’t want to forget anything or you’ll have April to deal with. She scares me, how intense she is over all of this.”

  “No, but I’m on it. I called yesterday and said I’d be out tonight to catch up with him. I have training at six with Ben, so I’ll pop into Deacon’s when I finish about seven. After that, I might drop in on your sister. See if I can get more than a few words out of her. Hopefully she won’t toss me out of the shop.”

  Drew left and Liam changed into workout gear, collected his briefcase, and headed to the club.

  When he walked in the door, Ben was busy pummeling a boxing bag while a group of youngsters were warming up for their sessions with him.

  Liam walked in, dropped his bag on the floor, and stretched his arms out, flexing his hands. “Hey, Ben.”

  Ben finished with a roundhouse kick before grabbing a towel from the corner to wipe the sweat from his face. Even though criminal pursuits on Hope Island generally weren’t too frequent, Ben still liked to keep fit and active. He wiped his face and slung the towel around his neck.

  “Liam, I was going to call you. You know how we talked about the self-defense class for women and girls?”

  Liam pulled his boxing gloves from his gym bag and pulled them on while he listened. “Yes, I do.”

  “I’ve worked out a program for once-a-week sessions for eight weeks. Even done up flyers. I was hoping you could be a kind soul and deliver them around town for me. I’m on shift for the next five days straight and won’t get a chance.”

  “Sure.” It’d been a good idea to put the class together, and having the support of the local people would go a long way to filling up the spots. Anything they could do to keep the island women and girls safe was a bonus for both men.

  “And I wondered if you’d mind helping out with one of my training sessions? Maybe take the teenage boys’ class on a Monday so I can do the self-defense?”

  “Easy. No worries. Anything to help.”

  Ben flexed his arms and stretched. He was so different from the gangly teenager he’d been growing up. He was all muscle, and loved working out to stay fit. The kind of guy anyone would like to be on his side when things got rough. “Great. I really appreciate it. The women’s shelter is keen for us to get going with it so now is perfect as far as I’m concerned.”

  “Make sure you put those flyers in my bag before I go and I’ll start handing them out everywhere in the morning.”

  After Liam finished his workout and helped Ben with the teen class for a couple of rounds of sparring, he headed out to see Deacon Fielding. Deacon’s carriage and Clydesdales were often used for weddings on the island, and April loved the idea of arriving at the small church in the open carriage.

  “Deacon, how are you?” Liam found him feeding his horses in the stable by the big log house he lived in.

  Deacon put down his bucket and walked over to shake Liam’s hand. “Good, good. So, Drew finally called a date for the wedding?”

  “Yep, sure did. Decided there was no point waiting since they’re all living together at the new house anyway. May as well make it official.” Liam stepped over to the big
horse, leaned over the stable door and rubbed its head. He stepped back when it tried to rub against him. “Ah, you big soft thing.”

  “He’ll leave loads of hair all over that shirt of yours if you let him.”

  “Doesn’t matter. Just finished training so I need a shower anyway.”

  Deacon picked up the bucket again, reached over the gate and filled the horse’s feed bin. “That’ll keep him happy. Come and walk outside with me and we can talk about what Drew needs me to do.”

  When Liam had finalized arrangements for the horse and carriage, the sun had long gone from the sky. He drove home for a quick shower before going out again. A hazy calm lay over Hope Island as he drove down to the harbor where the town’s shopping village sat perched in the quiet evening glow. He parked behind the bakery, knowing there was no point trying to go through the front of the shop as the door would be locked. Besides, Aggie wouldn’t hear him banging on the door if she had her industrial mixers churning away inside.

  He smoothed down his casual jacket and checked he didn’t have anything stuck in his teeth before he got out of the car, a handful of flyers with him. His heart pounded as he locked the vehicle. With a hint of trepidation mixed with a healthy dose of anticipation, Liam made his way to the back door. He knocked and waited. Knocked again and peered through the security screen. He couldn’t see Aggie but there was definitely movement inside. The mixers churned away so she’d started her prep.

  Liam tried the door and found it unlocked. He stepped inside. He moved through the back entrance, past the bags of flour and opened his mouth to call out when he smacked right into her.

  Aggie screamed and stumbled back. Liam grabbed her to stop her falling to the ground, and she swung at him, scoring her nails down his cheeks.

  * * *

  Aggie gasped for air. She couldn’t breathe. Her heart pounded so fast she could hear it pushing the blood through her veins. Ears ringing, mouth dry, she tried to scream but her throat locked up. She lashed out, her nails clawing at anything she could make contact with. Arms grabbed her and she kicked wildly, desperate to save herself any way she could.

  “Aggie, stop! Aggie!”

  He pulled her close, bound her arms against her sides, and the fear kicked up a notch. She wanted to throw up. She couldn’t get loose. Darkness started to take over and she let it swallow her whole. Not again, oh god, please not again.

  * * *

  A hand wiped across her cheek. “Aggie, hey, wake up. It’s Liam. You passed out.”

  Liam? She bolted upright and scrambled away from him into a corner, her back pressed against the wall. “What are you doing here?” She looked around, her eyes darting from corner to corner, looking for her assailant.

  “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

  She fell back on her butt. Of all the idiotic things to do. He was the one who had scared the crap out of her, wasn’t he? “That was you? There isn’t someone else here?”

  “No. Just me.”

  She dropped her face in her hands and was thankful he kept his distance. “What do you want?”

  “To talk to you. The back door was open. I knocked, and I guess you didn’t hear me over the noise.”

  Aggie lifted her head and stared into his troubled eyes. She ran her hands over her hips and groaned. He was the last person she needed to see her having a panic attack. “I wasn’t expecting anyone. I thought the door was locked.”

  He stood and leaned against the opposite wall, his arms behind his back. “I’m the last person who’d hurt you. Don’t you know that?”

  He was more likely to smother her in love. It was the way he was and one of the reasons she’d fallen for him when she was a little girl. Liam Davidson, the kindest person she knew. “Yeah, I do. Don’t take it personally. You scared the crap out of me. I was in a world of my own and wasn’t expecting anyone.” She scrambled to her feet and noticed the papers laying over the floor. Liam didn’t make a move toward her, which she was grateful for. She couldn’t deal with soothing hugs right now. It would make her break down, and it was a struggle keeping her shit together every day as it was.

  “Nothing around here is likely to hurt you though. Safest town around. At least that’s what we always said growing up.” He watched her from hooded eyes.

  She shrugged. “Yeah, well, times change. This is an angry world we live in.” She should know better than anyone. “So what are you doing here?”

  “I wanted to see if you were okay. I went out to Deacon’s place after training and arranged for the horse and carriage. Thought I’d drop in and talk to you. Ben wants me to put up posters around town for his new self-defense class for women and girls. I was hoping you’d let me put one in the bakery.”

  So that accounted for the mess on the floor. He must have dropped them when she screamed. Aggie closed her eyes. Her world was still spinning, the nausea ripe in her throat, and talking about women’s self-defense didn’t help at all.

  “I’m walking closer, Aggie.”

  She opened her eyes and found Liam standing right in front of her.

  “You need to sit down. Come on, let me help you.” He slid his arm through hers, helped her to the small cupboard she called an office, and pushed her into the chair. “I’m going to make you a cup of tea and sit with you until you feel better.”

  She tried to protest but it came out sounding feeble. “No. Look. I don’t need help, okay? It was just a fright. You caught me unawares, but I’ll be all right.”

  “You can lie to yourself all you want, Aggie, but don’t lie to me. I know you too well.” He walked out and Aggie could hear him puttering around the kitchen counter.

  It would be so easy to give in and let him take care of her. Nobody would mess with her if Liam was around. Physically fit and strong, as well as easy on the eye, he’d be the perfect person to shield her from the horrors that haunted her.

  But it wasn’t what she wanted. More than anything, Aggie needed to know she was still the same person she used to be. Somehow, she had trouble believing it, which made her think that Liam wouldn’t either. Once he knew, he’d never look at her the same way again.

  Was she ready for that?

  She lay her head back against the wall while he made them both a cup of tea. When he came back in and placed her cup down on the table, she opened her eyes and stared into his face. His usually soft lips were tight and his warm hazel eyes concerned. She saw nothing but love and concern there. It broke her heart that she felt it was misplaced no matter how much she wanted it.

  “Where’s your other baker? Lauren, isn’t it?”

  “She called in sick.”

  “So, you’re here on your own?”

  “Looks like it, but I often work alone. I’ll make sure to lock the door when you leave.”

  “Aggie, I want to help you sort out whatever’s bothering you.”

  “Nothing’s bothering me. Stop fussing. You’re not my mother.”

  “But I’m your friend. At least I used to be. Let me in, Aggie. Let me help you find your happy again.”

  “You can’t.” Nobody could.

  “Only because you won’t let me.” He perched his hip on the corner of her cluttered desk and sipped at his cup. “I know something happened and you don’t want to talk about it. But you can’t keep going like this.”

  “Nothing happened and I’m fine.”

  “That’s bullshit and you know it. Why can you tell April what’s wrong but not me? We were tight once. You told me everything back then.”

  She glared at him, her mouth tight.

  “Before you go off in a tangent, no, April hasn’t said anything. Oh, Drew tried to get it out of her, and you know your brother. He hates that you’re keeping something from him. But she’s staying tight-lipped. It was more what she didn’t say that made me think. And the way you acted just now only confirmed it. Someone hurt you, didn’t they? Something happened in Seattle before you came back to the island.”

  Tears flooded her eyes and s
he brushed them away angrily. “No. Nobody hurt me.”

  “I don’t believe you. But I will respect you, Aggie. Let me in; let us be friends again.”

  “I’m too busy for more than what we have now.”

  “We don’t have anything anymore—haven’t for ages—but I guess you hadn’t noticed. You’ve closed yourself off to everyone, including me.”

  The anger shone in his eyes and Aggie would give anything to change that, but she couldn’t do it. He’d look at her differently. Everyone would. There’d be pity and sorrow. And disgust would follow. Dismay. Then the criticism would kick in. What had she done to deserve it? Maybe if she’d dressed differently, or found a job that didn’t require her to walk home at night. She’d been asking for it. Wasn’t that the usual saying? So much for the #metoo movement. Some people still looked upon women as easy targets. No way would she leave herself open for that kind of response.

  She wasn’t about to let Liam look at her the way she imagined he would. She didn’t want his pity. She’d wanted his love, his respect once upon a time. That was now out of her reach. She’d settle for indifference instead. It would be less painful.

  “I’m not leaving you alone tonight. You do your thing and I’ll sit quietly here in the office so you feel safe. If you want me to help make bread, you’ll have to show me what to do.”

  Surely he didn’t mean it? She couldn’t work with him hovering over her. “Don’t be ridiculous. You have work tomorrow. How do you think your patients will feel if you fall asleep while tending to them because you’ve been playing in the bakery all night?”

  “Either you let me stay, or I’ll call and get your father down here to help. Your choice.”

  She bristled. He would too. “Fine. Keep out of my way then. I have lots to do.”

  She grabbed her cup and stormed out of the office, hoping he had the most uncomfortable night stuck in her small room. She sure as hell would with him sitting within reach, looking so damned sexy in his casual pants and white shirt. Bastard. He was a distraction she might want but certainly didn’t need.